June 16, 2016
My freezer is still full of ice cream from my birthday party 3 weeks ago…which is every pregnant woman’s dream! It is so fun to look back on all the great memories from my 27th year, but this year something was different as I reflected. I noticed something was off when I began to feel a little disappointed. In reflection, I realized I had spent too much of last year critiquing myself and creating a list of things I wished would change. My mind comfortably hosted too many thoughts about what was not perfect about myself or who I wished I had become by now. I was striving for perfection which only made me realize how far away from it I am.
The worst part is, if all you can see are the imperfections in yourself, it becomes too easy to see the imperfections in others. If I am not ok with my mess, how will I be ok with others? #judgement #comparison #jealousy #bummer
This is a sketchy trap and not who Jesus is or who He wants us to be. I actually think God is quite enamored with us…after all he sees Jesus in us, not our failures. If we can win God’s affection by our perfection, we aren’t believing in the full power of the cross.
So I’ve been trying to re-train my brain to dwell on the good, even if it looks messy! I have begun declaring truth over myself and listing all of the things I love about others.
Here is the cool part…
As I’ve began to speak nicely to myself and focus on the good instead of the bad, I’ve actually fallen more in love with Rob. I have noticed traits about him that I’ve never seen before…and they are amazing. Rob is amazing. You guys for real, he is freakin’ awesome! I am in awe of his character and I honestly hope I become more like him. I have spent too much of my marriage noticing the things that should change and not enough time savoring the gifts that should remain!
If you want to be more gracious and kind to others….start with yourself. Practice speaking kind things over yourself! We will never arrive to perfection, that is Jesus’ job, not ours. Let go of arriving to perfection and start enjoying the process of who you are becoming.
Need permission to let go and dwell in a positive and joyful mindset? Read Philippians 4:8.
So, let’s allow the process to be what is beautiful, not the perfection. After all, we are going to spend most of our life in process so we might as well find beauty there and enjoy the ride.